December 2009
24 posts
“Hey Charity;
Happy Half Hour!
That’s what your GrandPa used to say for...”
– my dad
sign on a hair salon sign "foils frost perms"
adam: I want all three
me: you're awesome
“I just want something with boobs”
– allie
“I’m that thing at car dealerships”
– allie
“she dressed really 80’s. she had these dresses with big shoulder puffs.”
– Lauren
“you noisy old goats!”
– chuck referring to me & allie gale
“for inspiration, I often imagine a courtesan living out her life in a circus”
– Christian louboutin
dad called...
dad: i love the american indians. man, i tell ya
me: why?
dad: i...i can't remember. i'll call ya back
click.
me: did I tell you that iceberg lettuce isn't really nutritionally void as once thought?
Adam: oh really? so that was just propaganda started by the Romaine lobby?
“well aren’t you just heaven on a stick?”
– Carlos @ jonathan adler
Adam: I think I wanna be a helicopter pilot
me: that's HOT!
pet peeve
people who slowly write a check or count out change to pay. get a debit card already!
awkward car call
lots of fun!
“Toyota FJ looks like a mini Cooper with a thyroid problem”
– Mitch
“animation is NOT decoration”
– me
me: this guy thinks he's a Labrador retriever. he's got a scarf around his neck.
Mitch: hmmmm, what?!
me: who's the world reigning mens figure skating champion?
Mitch: just cuz the gays own that sport doesn't mean I know!
pizza hut’s new lard stuffed crust pizza! get a 36” for only $1 more!
fatten up the whole family so a witch can eat them
I hate Windermere
Christmas music just doesn’t sound right on steel drums…
“you live somewhere weird, right?”
– Jonathan Adler